Would you like to learn gaslighting phrases so you can recognize them as they happen? These are the most common statements bullies will use to make you doubt yourself.

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When bullies hurl gaslighting statements your way, it can be twice as hurtful. Why? Because they victimize you a second time after you call out the initial abuse.

As one who’s personally experienced this kind of behavior, I’m giving you the top gaslighting phrases to keep an ear out for.

You are going to learn the most common gaslighting phrases bullies use against their targets.

After you learn about all these statements, you will be better prepared to use the right comebacks to shut these creeps down. Moreover, you will have a better chance of regaining control of your life.

This post is all about the most common gaslighting phrases that every target of bullying should watch for.

Gaslighting phrases:

Before we begin with the seven most common phrases used by gaslighters, let’s learn the definition and goal of gaslighting.

So, what is gaslighting?

Gaslighting comes from the 1940s film, “Gaslight,” in which an abusive husband exploits his wife. And he does so by trying to convince her that she is coming unglued. Another word for this type of abuse is “crazymaking.”

Gaslighting is a form of manipulation that bullies use to make you doubt your own personal experiences. Moreover, the goal of gaslighting is for abusers to wield more power over you and diminish your account of the abuse.

It is a sick and perverse mind game abusers play. So, what are the most common gaslighting phases bullies use, and what do they sound like?

1. “You’re only imagining things.”

Bullies and abusers use this phrase to get you to doubt your own reality. And they do it to question your own sanity. Furthermore, they aim to discredit you and get bystanders to question you. It’s so easy, it shouldn’t work.

But it does work, perhaps, a little too well!

By using this phrase, the gaslighter attacks your ability to remember things accurately. Just as they do with the first statement, they discredit you by making you seem like you’ve lost your mind.

Moreover, they use this phrase to humiliate and silence you. Bullies hope that by doing this, they can make you so afraid of looking unstable that you’ll clam up.

Gaslighting Phrases:

This phrase has many goals.

• to discredit and embarrass you in front of others.
• To intimidate you
• And to silence you.

This is why so many victims of this tactic eventually stop talking. And it’s why bullies and abusers continue and escalate the abuse without consequences.

2. “That Didn’t happen.”

This is another deceitful response that bullies and abusers quote to discredit you. This statement is also designed to attack your memory. It also makes you seem like you can’t keep your story straight.

Moreover, when bullies make this statement, they make sure to look confident when they say it. They also say it with conviction. Here’s one thing you should know right now!

Abusers know that confidence (even false confidence) and conviction are THE two ingredients that will make any lie believable to bystanders.

So, be sure to keep this last bold sentence in the back of your mind! Always!

3. “You’re out of your mind.”

This is, perhaps, the worst of all gaslighting phrases.

Yep. There’s that mental health label again. Attacking your mental stability is the worst thing your bullies and abusers could ever do.

The reason is that society treats those with mental illness the worst. Therefore, they believe them the least. People with mental illness are the easiest to discredit, and bullies know it.

Moreover, hardened criminals and former prison inmates get better treatment than the mentally unstable. The reality is that people will take the word of a bank robber, a rapist, or even a murderer over them.

Bullies and abusers instinctively know this. When they attack your sanity, they immediately shove you to the bottom of the societal hierarchy. Furthermore, this kind of label is the most difficult to tear off.

It’s much easier to exonerate yourself from accusations of a heinous crime than it is from the mental health label.

Additionally, they set you up to face a truckload of hate, discrimination, and prejudice. Why? Because society has an intense hatred of those with mental illness.

Gaslighting Phrases:

those perceived to be mentally ill are treated worse than hardened criminals.

Even the mere perception that you are imbalanced can bring hatred to your doorstep. In fact, you may be the most stable person on the face of the earth.

However, all it takes is for one person to paint you as “unhinged.” They can spread the word to enough people. Then, they can kick back and let the court of public opinion take it from there. It’s that easy.

 As a result, your reputation will fall like a meteor. ‘You see? Here’s the rub.

Indeed, no one can ever prove that you’re mentally unstable. However, there’s also no way to prove that you’re not.

Mental health is almost impossible to prove.

Again, bullies know this. And that’s what makes this label so brutal. It has ruined the lives of many good, honest, and hardworking people.

4. “this is why nobody likes you.”

Bullies and abusers are masters at isolating you. They very skillfully use smear campaigns to turn friends and family members against you.

Bullies do this by reversing the roles and playing the victim. Then, they’ll slander you to anyone who’ll listen.

And the reason they do this is to confirm that you are a bad person. Moreover, they can break down the support system you once had.

Gaslighting Phrases:

Once your bullies isolate you, you’re theirs to do whatever they want with.

Once people turn on you, they get a green light to continue and intensify the abuse. Bullies can now abuse you freely without fear. Because who’s going to butt in? Who’s going to interfere? And who’s going to come to your rescue?

This is why bullies despise it when you have people who love and care about you. It undermines their power and control over you.

And once they’ve isolated you, this is the phrase you will hear them say. You bullies will say this to make you feel devalued. Also, they do it to drive home the point that you aren’t worthy of love and friendship.

The goal here is to break your confidence and lower your self-esteem. Understand that the goal of gaslighting statements is to condition you over time.

The process of gaslighting is gradual and slowly wears you down until it leaves you totally powerless.

5. “You Bring It all On Yourself,” Is another one of the most obvious of gaslighting phrases.

This evil and self-serving statement is meant to shift responsibility from the bully to you. Because they refuse to take accountability, they blame you.

In doing this, they re-victimize you by blaming you for their abuse. Other gaslighting phrases include:

• “It’s your own fault.”
• “You got what was coming to you.”
• “You made me hurt you.”

NOTE: “You made me” statements are obvious gaslighting phrases. Therefore, see them for what they are. And cut ties with the gaslighter immediately, if possible. If this isn’t possible right away, you may need to plan your exit slowly and carefully. And you may have to watch and wait for the opportunity to get out.

6. You’re over-reacting” or “You’re being too sensitive.”

Gaslighting statements like these are used to trivialize your experiences. Understand that bullies are experts at downplaying their behavior and your feelings about it.

The goal here is to undermine your voice and your word in front of an audience. And they try to convince others not to take you seriously.

If your bullies can make others question your credibility, they can bleed you of any outside support.

7. “Everyone is on my side!” or “Everyone Agrees with me!”

This is also one of the top 3 worst gaslighting phrases. The reason it’s so bad is that it makes you feel outvoted.

In other words, by making this statement, the bullies want you to feel as if everyone is ganging up on you.

Therefore, the more people you think side with the bullies, the more likely you are to doubt and question your own judgment. Abusers hope you do. Why? Because if you doubt yourself, it’s easier for others to doubt you, too.

In conclusion

If you want to preserve your mental health, you must know who you are and what you experience. Stay strong and never doubt what you see, hear, and experience. Do it, no matter what mind games and tricks your bullies play.

Also, if possible, you must leave the environment (the company, the school, the relationship) if you expect to begin healing and take back control of your life.

Remember that people have left their home countries to escape oppression. That’s what gaslighting is: it’s a form of oppression, as are other kinds of bullying and abuse.

It won’t be easy. In fact, it will be tough for a while. But it will be worth it in the end! I promise!

This post is all about the most common gaslighting phrases to help you see gaslighting for what it is and find a way out of any bullying environment!

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Signs of Gaslighting: The 7 Signs You Must Know

2. How to Respond to DARVO: 7 Powerful Ways to Shut it Down

3. Gaslighting at Work: 5 Surefire Indicators to Watch Out for