bully proof Archives

Do you want to know how to bully proof yourself and go from victim to victor? Here are the tried-and-true do’s and don’ts you need to know.

There’s no better feeling than succeeding in making yourself bully proof. If people are targeting you for bullying, you’re probably wondering how you can go about doing it.

As someone who has been right where you are, I’m sharing the dos and don’ts to help you resist bullies.

You will learn exactly what to do and what to avoid doing to bully proof yourself.

After you learn these unwritten rules, you are going to be emotionally resistant to any verbal and psychological attack bullies may throw at you.

This post is all about how to bully proof yourself to help you take back your peace, your autonomy, and your life.

Bully Proof

When targets endure continuous onslaughts of bullying, slow changes happen. Moreover, these changes will happen in their self-esteem, personalities, and body language.

But they may or may not even be aware of these negative changes. Not until the bullying has gotten out of control.

These transformations are normal when dealing with any abuse. However, they can bring about even more bullying and abuse.

Remember that bullies feed off your low self-esteem. And once they get a whiff that you’re victim material, the bullying becomes a pattern.

But here’s the good news.

If you’re being bullied, you don’t have to let that happen. You have more control over your circumstances than you think.

Therefore, how you bully proof yourself is NEVER TO DO THESE 7 THINGS:

1. go on the Defensive nor explain yourself.

Any time you defend or explain yourself to a bully, you appear weak to them. Why? Because the hidden subtext is that you feel you must answer to them. So, you give away your power.

Moreover, bullies don’t care what your reasons are. The only reason they blame or accuse you is to bait you into explaining yourself.

Understand that your bullies are looking for psychological payoffs. And those rewards are satisfaction, gratification, and a massive power rush.

In other words, you’re trying to convince the bully that you didn’t do whatever they accuse you of. But you’re only wasting your breath.

As a result, they’re only smirking and mentally patting themselves on the back. Why? Because of how easily they can get you to react.

They know they can scare you and make you nervous. And bullies love it when they can get you all up in arms.

To bully proof yourself, think about these 3 extra points:

No matter what you say, bullies will never believe you anyway.
Bullies only believe whatever feels convenient for them.
They aren’t interested in evidence or facts.

You may make them go away for the time being, but believe me when I tell you. Your bullies will only get angrier at you for having the gall to prove them wrong.

Then, they’ll regroup, reorganize, and come back at you with a whole new accusation later. Then they’ll demand another explanation.

Anytime bullies accuse you of something you know nothing about, they already know you’re innocent.

Therefore, realize that some things don’t need an explanation. And some people don’t deserve one. In fact, you don’t owe them a damn thing. Therefore, don’t go on the defensive unless they’re your parents, spouse, or boss.

2. To bully Proof yourself, never Apologize for anything.

This is not to say that apologizing is wrong, because it isn’t. But give one only when it’s warranted.

However, when others bully you, they force you to take responsibility for things you had nothing to do with. Stop taking blame for things that are beyond your control.

Over-apologizing is a self-defeating habit. It won’t protect you from further abuse. But even if it does save you from being brutalized, it still eats away at your self-esteem.

There’s a time to apologize and a time not to.

Here’s one thing you must know right now! A bully does not deserve your apology.

Again, bullies see any apology you give as weakness. They look at it as subjugation. In their minds, you’re only begging them not to hurt you. And they will only use it against you.

In other words, giving any apology in front of bullies puts you in a position of weakness. And they’ll only take advantage of it.

You must realize that not everything that happens is your burden to carry. And when you make unnecessary apologies, you take responsibility for things that aren’t your fault.

And when you give bullies undeserved apologies, you take accountability for their crappy behavior. Reserve your apologies only for people who deserve them.

So, how do you respond to a bully when they’re making accusations?

Bully Proof:

Here are a few responses you should give to bullies INSTEAD OF apologies:

You’ll get over it.
Relax. You’ll be alright.
Don’t worry. You’ll forget all about this by the end of the day.

This is how to respond to bullies when they demand an apology.

3. Hit the bully first (unless they’re in your face).

Bullies will deliberately provoke you to bait you into hitting them first. They do this for two reasons.

They want an excuse to fight you.
They want to get you in trouble.

The only time you can hit them first is if they get in your face. Why? Because when they get that close, it means that they’re about to attack you physically.

Only then should you hit the bully first to protect yourself. In times like this, offense is the best defense. And by all means, defend yourself if the bully tries to attack you.

Just don’t snap. This is how many shootings happen! So, keep your wits about you.

**4. to become bully proof, you must never People-please.**

Bullies and their followers only see this as butt-kissing. To them, you’re trying to win approval. And they get a thrill out of seeing you bend the knee to everyone. Therefore, don’t do it.

Why? Because if you do, they’ll use it to their advantage.

Furthermore, bullies will often dangle carrots of acceptance and friendship in front of you, only to pull them back when you reach for them.

Never subject yourself to these kinds of mind games. Don’t be a simp for approval. This kind of behavior is pathetic, and it’s beneath you.

5. Do Not Stay silent.

Bullies thrive on your silence. Staying quiet about it will give them a green light to escalate the abuse.

Instead, report it. The bullies may call you a “snitch” and retaliate. And authorities may not believe you. But you’ve said your piece, and the word is still out.

They may not listen to you, but they can’t unhear you, either. Always remember that.

Bully Proof:

6. Don’t Go where the bullies gather.

Passing through the places you know your bullies hang out is asking for trouble. Therefore, the best thing to do is to avoid those places.

It’s one of the best ways to keep yourself safe.

7. Never Slouch or look down.

Slouching and looking down only signals low self-esteem. These are signals you never want to give off in the presence of bullies and abusers.

Remember that bullies are like a pack of wolves. And a pack of wolves will only attack the weakest member of the herd.

It’s the same with bullies. If they perceive even a whiff of weakness, they will prey on it.

Therefore, do the exact opposite of these things. Always appear confident! It’s how you avoid becoming bully bait.

One thing I should also mention. Never isolate yourself because you only cut yourself off from support. Moreover, you only play into your bullies’ hands because it’s exactly what they want!

Bully Proof:

Here’s a quick summary:

A bully is the last person you must answer to. Never explain, apologize to, or go on the defensive with bullies. You owe them nothing!
Instead of apologizing to bullies, say, “You’ll get over it.” It’s the perfect alternative to an apology.
Stay calm when a bully provokes you. Let them get in your face before you decide to hit them first. And if they hit you first, hit them back. This is not assault, it’s self-defense.
Never people-please. Put yourself first and do the things you want to do, not what others want you to do.
Never stay silent when you’re being bullied. Speak up and call out your bullies. Understand that when someone violates your boundaries, you have the right to talk about it.
Avoid the places bullies gather. Instead of passing through their hangout spot, take a different route. And if the bullies demand that you meet them somewhere to fight, don’t go!
Stand up straight instead of slouching. Also, keep your head up and look ahead rather than lowering it and looking down.