Knowing Your Value

September 8, 2026July 25, 2026Leave a comment

Do you know just how life-changing knowing your value can be? Here’s why this is so crucial.

Photo from Canva

When you look outside of yourself for value, you don’t know your value. Then, you have problems.

Therefore, in this post, you’ll learn why knowing your value matters. You’ll know why it’s important.

Once you learn this crucial information, you’ll stop looking for it from outside sources. And you’ll draw your worth from within.

This post is all about knowing your value and why it’s the best thing you can do so that you’ll no longer depend on others for it. And you’ll raise your self-esteem.

Knowing Your Value

Bullying is hurtful no matter how confident you are. We’re all human, and we all want to be accepted. Everyone desires to have a sense of belonging.

However, the effects of bullying are even more damaging when we’re insecure and look to others to give us a feeling of worth. In fact, the damage to self-esteem is exponentially more serious.

The problem is that when you look outside of yourself for value, you automatically look to others to give it to you. And when you do this, you put yourself at their mercy.

Knowing your worth is your foundation for healthy self-esteem. It’s never good to look outside of ourselves for it. Understand that your worth comes from within and never from without.

Here’s why it’s better to let your value come from the inside:

1. You can never control the environment around you.

There will be times when you find yourself in a toxic environment. When you know your value, bullying won’t have such an impact on you.

It may sting a little. But it won’t devastate you. Moreover, you won’t suppress yourself to gain acceptance. Why? You’ll know who you are.

Moreover, you’ll know why they bully you. You’ll realize that the people around you are only saying hurtful things to diminish you.

Also, when the crap gets too thick, you’ll know when it’s time to walk. In knowing yourself and knowing your worth, you’ll realize that you don’t deserve that kind of treatment. And you’ll be better off leaving that cesspit and moving on to greener pastures.

And you’ll do it without feeling guilty. You’ll know that it isn’t because you’re “chicken” or “running away from your problems.” You’ll walk away because you deserve better.

Moreover, you’ll know what’s best for you. Therefore, you won’t feel guilty about putting yourself first.

Knowing Your Value:

2. You can’t control how others act toward you.

It’s never good to rely on others’ approval to get your value. Understand that there will always be people who don’t like you. Some may even hate you.

So, when you depend solely on the approval of others, you make yourself a doormat. Please, for your own sake, don’t give another person that kind of power!

When your value comes from within, you will have respect for yourself. And you will love yourself and have great self-esteem. You will give yourself compassion and stand strong when others take pot shots at you.

You will have the confidence and courage to protect yourself and stand up to abuse. Moreover, you will know without a doubt that the idiots around you are the ones with the issues.

Your value should always come from you. Never from another. You get your value from knowing who you are and knowing that you were put on this earth for a good reason.

Realize that everyone serves a good and higher purpose here. You may not know what that purpose is. So, find that purpose and fulfill it.

Knowing your value will give you the courage to be disliked.

Years ago, I let anyone’s negative opinions of me get under my skin. However, I didn’t realize that I was giving away my power. In other words, I was allowing what people thought to control me.

After I became an adult and finally began to see my worth, I realized I was worrying over needless things. That’s when I began to ask myself,

“Have any of these morons even reached my level?”

“Do their opinions even matter?

“Who are these people that I should care?”

Moreover, my classmates never knew me. They aren’t and never were my family or closest friends. Today, the weight I give to any opinion depends on who holds it and on my relationship with that person.

Therefore, if you’re a target of bullying, you should have the same attitude. Realize that not everyone’s thoughts or opinions are relevant, nor do their words mean anything.

To be offended by another person’s thoughts, opinions, or words, you must first value them. And that means you must first value the owner of those thoughts, opinions, and words.

The Value I Give Your Opinion Depends on Who You Are.

I now understand that my classmates’ hatred only came from ignorance, jealousy, or insecurity. Nothing more. And I take it with a grain of salt.

I only value the opinions of those who know me- God, those of my closest family members and friends. And, if you’re reading this, you should look at it the same way.

And once you realize where their behavior and their emotions come from, you will feel so much better. I can’t stress this enough.

To be hurt, angered, and offended by someone, you must first value their opinions. Moreover, to give any weight to their opinions, you must also value them to some degree.

Knowing Your Value:

Stop Caring what they think.

When you stop caring what bullies think of you, you stop valuing their opinions. In that, you stop giving bullies value and consideration they haven’t earned.

Therefore, you stop giving them power. And you’re free to be yourself no matter what they say about it.

Always be yourself. Stand up for your beliefs and convictions. Have your own preferences and make your own choices.

And do the things you love to do. And lastly, follow your own dreams and your heart. Do all of these things no matter who does or doesn’t like it.

Some People Aren’t Worth Your Time

Some people don’t come into your life to help you; they come to hinder you. Many people are predators. They actively look for those like you and me to prey on.

And when you give them the power to determine how you feel about yourself, you let yourself down. Moreover, you give them what they want.

Some don’t come into your life to love you; they come to use you. Evil people watch you closely.

And if you have something they wish they had, they may cozy up to you to either get something from you or to bring you down. To some people, you’re not a person. You’re an opportunity.

Knowing Your Value:

Some people come around to use you.

They don’t love you for you; they love you for what you can do for them. Or they do it for what they can take from you. Therefore, some people aren’t loyal to you. They’re loyal to the benefits that come with you.

But where are they when you need help? This is why they disappear, no matter how many times you’ve appeared for them. This is why knowing your value is so important.

When you discover your value, you’ll stop standing behind people who don’t stand behind you. And you’ll quit breaking your back for those who don’t have yours.

In other words, you’ll stop busting your ass for people who aren’t watching yours. Realize that some people aren’t blessings; they’re lessons.

And when you know your worth, you aren’t afraid of being alone. Therefore, you aren’t scared of walking away from these kinds of people. You’ll drop them like a bad habit.

As a result, you’ll make room for true friends. And these people will love you for simply being beautiful, wonderful, awesome you!

Here’s What it Means to Begin knowing your value.

It means refusing to stay around people who don’t.
It means eliminating drama from your life.
It means not settling for less than you deserve.
It means being okay with being alone rather than clinging to those who treat you like an option.
It means loving yourself enough to know when it’s time to walk away.
It means not caring what others think or say of you.
It means embracing the dislike of a few who don’t matter anyhow.
It means letting go of toxic people, even if you love them, and not being concerned with the outcome.
It means having the guts to say “no” without guilt.
It means being nitpicky about the people you let in your life.
It means being a bitch when the situation calls for it.
It means not feeling guilty about putting yourself first.
It means allowing yourself to make mistakes and learn from them.
It means not being afraid to fail.
It means embracing the good, bad, and ugly parts of yourself.
It means being comfortable in your skin.
But most of all, it means freedom!

In Conclusion

The above is especially true for women. Knowing your value is the difference between a good life and a difficult one. It’s in how you teach others to treat you. You’re worth more than you realize.

Always remember that!

This post is all about knowing your value so that you can open your eyes and see your worth and grab the life you deserve.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. How to Know Your Worth: 9 Tips to Build Your Self-Esteem

2. Opinions are Not Facts: 7 Reasons Those of Bullies Don’t Matter

3. Loving Yourself First: 7 Amazing Benefits of Treating Yourself Well

4. Know Your Worth: 4 Reasons It’s Important

5. A Woman Who Knows Her Worth: 7 Things She’ll Never Settle for

Bullying and Selective Outrage

September 4, 2026July 25, 202611 Comments

Bullying and selective outrage go hand in hand. Here’s why bullies are selective with their outrage and everything else you need to know.

Photo from Canva

A bully’s outrage is always selective. Where there’s bullying, there’s usually a phenomenon called “selective outrage.” So, what is selective outrage?

It’s when people become outraged over something the targeted person says or does. However, they ignore or approve of it when anyone else says or does the same or worse.

Therefore, in this post, you will learn all about bullying and selective outrage.

Once you learn this crucial information, you will be able to recognize selective outrage when it happens. And you will call it out confidently.

This post is all about bullying and selective outrage so that you can call your bullies out when they try to point at you for behavior they allow in others.

Bullying and Selective Outrage

Here’s a perfect example of selective outrage:

For years, bullies repeatedly and viciously attack you both physically and psychologically. And no one says a word. There comes a day when you finally get fed up with being walked on.

As a result, you beat the living crap out of your bullies in self-defense. Now, suddenly, everyone is outraged. However, they’re not angry at the bullies.

They’re pissed off at you for having the gall to defend yourself.

“Oh, the nerve!”

“How dare you!”

It’s not about the deed. It’s who’s doing it.

You see it all the time. It’s not about the deed itself; it’s about who’s doing the deed. Bullies will berate you for things others get away with.

Therefore, they don’t care about the wrongdoing. They’re just selective of who they should be pissed at for doing it.

You see? Bullies want to feel like they’re better than you. So they hop on their moral high horse. They shame you for something they would approve of if it came from anyone else.

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

Here’s another example:

Let’s say that you tell a legitimately funny joke. And it offends and outrages the bullies. Sometime later, someone else tells the same joke.

The same bullies who were pissed at you earlier burst into laughter and slap the joker on the back. And they tell the second person what a “good joke” it was.

However, if they really thought it was a bad joke, they would be against it 100%, across the board. If it’s wrong for one person to tell, then it’s wrong for everyone.

Otherwise, they’re only holding you to a double standard. To sum it up, it’s blatant hypocrisy.

Selective outrage is just plain hypocrisy.

Understand that people who can’t have a good time want you to be miserable like they are. Again, it’s not about the joke itself. It’s about who’s telling the joke.

Therefore, bullies and their sheepy followers and conformers let who the person is determine whether they should take offense.

Stop and think about it for a moment. Selective outrage is something you often see at ball games. When the home team cheats or bends the rules, people ignore or even justify it.

However, when the opposing team does it, people suddenly become angry and want to punish the opponents.

The sooner you see this hypocrisy for what it is, the better off you’ll be. You’ll be able to expose it and weaponize it.

And you will be better able to stand up to this madness and come out of it with minimal damage to your psyche.

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

“Offended” Bullies

Isn’t it strange that, nowadays, we have so many people who are so easy to offend? What’s really funny is that most of these soft little cream puffs are bullies.

In fact, bullies have such fragile egos that it takes zero effort to offend them- especially if you’re their victim. Your mere presence alone is enough to insult them.

Understand that people who are easily offended take things out of context. They attach meaning to the behavior of others.

And they do it even when it has no personal meaning. Bullies have a flair for turning neutrality into a personal attack.

They conjure up meanings out of exchanges from others that are totally impersonal. With these pansies, it’s always:

“She doesn’t agree with everything I say, do, and think, so that means she doesn’t like me!”

“He has a different opinion than me, so that means he’s looking down his nose at me!”

“She doesn’t like the same things I like, so that means she hates me!”

Therefore, these sad (and hateful) wusses presume to know what others are thinking.

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

You don’t have to tiptoe around these assholes.

In life, you will run into these types of people. That’s why it’s best to divert the conversation to a neutral topic. Or, you can walk away because they aren’t worth the energy expenditure.

Want to know the reason why bullies are easily offended? It’s because they place too much value on what others think of them.

This is no way to live. When you place too much importance on approval, you give others power over you. In short, you make yourself their servant- for free!

Bullies try to maintain an image. They have a nasty habit of being too occupied with how others think of them. Moreover, they over-analyze the images others may (or may not) have of them.

This is a waste of time.

Approval was Survival back in the prehistoric times.

Back in the days of the cavemen, people had to find acceptance by their in-group. Why? Because it was a matter of life and death.

Back then, when your in-group rejected you, you risked starvation and extinction. And that went especially for women.

Thankfully, it isn’t like that today. Nevertheless, if you insult a bully or make them look foolish, they see it as the end of the world.

They fear the loss of their gleaming reputations. And the thought of becoming an outcast equals catastrophe to them!

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

Here’s how those who are easily offended think.

Bully supervisors become enraged at an employee for making a minor mistake. Why? Because they take it too personally.

They see it as a reflection on them. Therefore, they wish to punish their victim- forever! One tiny mistake makes you the enemy even if it was unintentional.

Bullies and the easily offended think the rules don’t apply to them. Therefore, when superiors make them follow the rules, they think the powers that be are “picking on” them. As a result, they feel a flash of powerlessness and lash out.

Understand that they have a child’s mentality. Emotionally, they never matured beyond age six. Their tactics may be way more sophisticated than a six-year-old’s.

But inside, they still have the attitude of one.

Overoffense and selective outrage only destroy peaceful societies.

We must realize that overoffense and selective outrage break down civilization. They are the causes of the societal rot that happens right before our eyes.

Moreover, it’s the catalyst of cancel culture.

It isn’t the real victims of bullying who are the crybabies. It’s the bullies and abusers themselves who have delicate little egos.

All it takes is for you to say, write, or do something they don’t like. And you can squash their egos like an overripe grape. It’s pathetic when you really think about it.

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

Here’s my message to bullies who get selectively outraged.

Your offense is nothing but an act. It’s a farce!

It’s time to grow up and accept that the world isn’t concerned about your feelings. Life isn’t always going to flow the way you want it to. And there’s nothing you can do about it. Life isn’t always fair.

And if you can get angry at someone for a certain behavior, then turn around and give someone else a pass for the same behavior, your outrage is fake.

Life isn’t fair for real targets of bullying. But they rarely complain.

Believe me, when I was bullied, life rarely went the way I wanted it. In fact, life wasn’t fair for me during those days.

Life is downright horrible for targets of bullying. But few of them whine about it. Most of them suffer in silence. However, if they do speak out about the abuse, they do it in a way that empowers them and others.

Targets of bullying do the best they can to get through each day. They keep working hard to achieve their goals. And they refuse to see themselves as victims.

Most of them keep pushing on. They get on with it and eventually find a way to empower themselves and overcome the bullying.

And those who don’t find a way to self-empowerment either don’t know how, or they’re in a position where they’re trapped.

Bullying and Selective Outrage:

In Conclusion

Again, bullies select who they get angry with. And they usually pick safe victims. And they do it because selective outrage offers many psychological rewards.

Selective outrage allows them to feel morally superior.
It allows them to bond with the in-group.
It gives them a sense of belonging.
Selective outrage gives them permission to rant and rave.
It gives them satisfaction.
It allows them to distract others from their own moral shortcomings.
Selective outrage also lets them project their own flaws onto a selected target.
It makes them feel like heroes fighting for truth and justice.
It allows them to boost their own social status.
Selective outrage allows bullies to use a shared enemy to forge alliances.

Therefore, is it any wonder bullying and selective outrage are such close siblings?

This post is all about bullying and selective outrage so that you can see it more clearly and call it out when you see it.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Selective Outrage: 7 Reasons Bullies Use It

2. Facts About Selective Outrage: 13 Truths You Need to Know

3. Selective Outrage Examples: Here’s What it Looks Like

4. Weaponized Morality: Another Tool in the Bully’s Toolbox

Resilience Strategies: 13 Powerful Tips to Stand Up to Bullying

September 1, 2026July 25, 20266 Comments

Want to know some resilience strategies to overcome bullying? Here are several you can use to help you stand tall when others bully you.

Photo from Canva

When you’re being bullied, you must develop resilience strategies to keep your self-esteem from crashing. Therefore, in this post, you will learn several tips you can use to stay resilient and overcome bullying.

Once you learn all these powerful tools, you will be a force to be reckoned with. And you will remain powerful when bullies come for you.

This post will give you all the resilience strategies you need to stand strong and remain confident.

Resilience Strategies

How can you practice resilience if you don’t know how? Here are powerful tools you can use to stay in control and keep your power.

1. Know Where the Bullying Comes From.

Most bullies bully to mask their own fears and insecurities. Therefore, realize that their behavior comes from their own mental issues. It doesn’t reflect on you.

In other words, how they act says more about them than you. It shows their lack of character. Moreover, bullies aren’t happy people. If they were, they wouldn’t feel the need to bring you down.

Therefore, always know where their behavior stems from. It will work wonders for your self-esteem.

2. Know your worth.

When you know your worth, you’re less likely to let the cruel behavior of a bully faze you. Understand that you can never control the atmosphere around you.

Toxic people are everywhere, and you have no control over how they behave.

Knowing your worth means understanding the value you bring to this world. Moreover, you won’t suppress your true self for the sake of fitting in.

Instead, you’ll continue to be yourself despite how they behave. And you’ll have the courage to walk away from bullies and abusers.

You’ll find it easier to bail out of relationships that don’t fulfill you. And you’ll drop fake friends like a bad habit.

This is because you’ll realize that you don’t deserve mistreatment. Moreover, you’ll walk away without feeling guilty.

Knowing your worth means not caring about what others think of you. And it gives you so much freedom.

When you let your love come from within, bullying won’t have such an impact on you. It will hurt, yes. But it won’t be as devastating.

Resilience Strategies:

3. Practice confident body language.

Practicing confident body language does so much for your self-esteem. Studies show that if you act confident, you will soon become confident. Now who doesn’t love that!

Confident body language means having good posture. Stand up straight and keep your shoulders back.

When sitting in a chair, don’t slouch. Sit up straight. Keep your spinal column in good alignment. Also, walk with purpose.

Psychologists who surveyed criminals asked them how they chose their victims. Want to know what those criminals answered? They said they picked their victims based on the way they walked.

And it’s one of the ways bullies also choose their victims. Therefore, always walk purposefully.

Your posture and how you walk should convey confidence. Slouching and walking aimlessly only communicates a lack thereof.

4. Take up space.

Powerful people take up space. They may stand with their feet shoulder-width apart and hands on their hips. Moreover, they may sit with their feet perched on their desk or legs apart.

They may also lean back in their chairs and clasp their hands behind their heads. Therefore, always convey power. And how you do it is to take up space.

Resilience Strategies:

5. Refuse to engage with your bullies.

By refusing to engage with your bullies, you remove their power. How? You may ask. You cut them off from any psychological rewards that a reaction may give them.

Now, this isn’t the same as ignoring them. When you ignore them, you don’t even look at them. And ignoring them doesn’t work.

However, when you refuse to engage, you give them a dismissive look. And you might scoff at them or curl your lip in disgust. But that’s it.

You give them just enough attention to show that they bore or disgust you. Then, you keep walking.

6. Use calm, cool, but short responses.

For instance, you can give your bullies a bored look, and calmly say, “Okay,” then keep walking. If they tell you that they hate you, you can calmly say, “That’s a you-problem,” then move on.

If they tell you that you’re a loser, you can say, “That’s your opinion.” You can also respond with, “Nice try,” or “Try harder next time.”

You can even pause, looking at them with pity or boredom. Then you can say, “Well, at least you tried.” Then walk away.

The key here is to respond in as few words as possible. The fewer words you use, the better. Why? Because it sends your bullies the message that they’re a waste of time.

For more roasts you can use to shut bullies down, go here.

Resilience Strategies:

7. Use stinging but funny comebacks.

Here’s an example: let’s say that your bullies tell you that you’re the most hated person in the school or workplace. You can come back with this gem of a quip.

“How did I get so lucky?”

If they tell you that your clothes look like they came from the Salvation Army, you can say, “Oh, you shop there too, huh?”

However, calm and cool is key here. Tips six and seven won’t work unless you say it calmly. So, keep your emotions out of it. Emotions are the kiss of death to any comeback.

8. Focus on your goals.

When you focus and work consistently on your goals, you won’t have time to think about your bullies. And you don’t care what they’re saying about you.

Consistency is key here. The more you work on achieving your goals, the more likely you are to succeed at them. And when you enjoy the journey, that’s even better.

If you continue focusing on your dreams, you’ll be so busy that your bullies won’t even be an afterthought. And you’ll be much happier!

Moreover, if you accomplish them, you’ll get to show them all up! And that will be the icing on the cake!

Resilience Strategies:

9. Form connections outside the bullying environment.

When you’re bullied, meeting people, especially new ones, can be difficult. And I say this from personal experience.

It’s easy to withdraw from social situations because you’re afraid people will reject you. After all, everyone you know already has. And you don’t want to risk it happening again.

However, you should never be afraid to meet new people. Why? Because they’re opportunities to make friends and allies. Total strangers are the best people to befriend.

Why? Because you have no history with them. They don’t know you from the bullying environment. So, you aren’t a target to them and are unlikely to be one.

With total strangers, you can start with a clean slate. You have opportunities to put your best foot forward and make new beginnings.

Therefore, when you meet someone new, don’t be shy. Find out what you have in common. Be genuinely interested in the person. People love those who show genuine interest in them.

Make small talk and show them the awesome, one-in-a-million you. I promise you that you’ll be glad you did. Moreover, your confidence and self-esteem will blast off!

10. Spend time with family and friends who love you.

When you’re being bullied, the last thing you want to do is keep company with those who bring you down. Therefore, spend time with people who lift you up.

Stick around those who love you and want what’s best for you. It’s the best way to keep your self-esteem from tanking. Moreover, it keeps you strong to face bullying another day until a door opens and you can escape the environment.

Resilience Strategies:

11. Take pride in your appearance.

When you look good, you feel good. Therefore, practice good grooming. Dress your best. Keep your hair neat.

You would be surprised at how being clean and looking sharp boost your self-esteem.

You don’t have to dress in the latest fashions or buy the most expensive clothes. The only thing you need is clean clothes that fit well and look sharp.

12. Indulge in your hobbies.

What are the things you love to do the most? Whatever they are, do the things you absolutely love to do.

Do what makes you feel alive! Not only will you feel more in control of your life, but you won’t have time to worry about what anyone thinks of you.

Resilience Strategies:

13. Stand Up for Yourself.

When people bully you, you have the right to stand up for yourself. In other words, defend yourself.

If a physical bully hauls off and hits you, defend yourself physically. If a verbal bully attacks you with words, come back with a good burn.

Or you can look at them with boredom and blow them off with a “whatever.” There are many things you can do to stand up to a bully.

However you do it, always defend yourself with a good response, not an emotional reaction. Remember that bullies only respond to strength.

In conclusion

Being resilient isn’t hard. All you need is to know how to do it effectively. Here’s a quick recap of the tips we discussed.

Know where the bullying comes from
Know your worth
Practice confident body language
Take up space.
Refuse to engage with your bullies.
Use calm, cool, but short responses.
Use stinging but funny comebacks.
Focus on your goals.
Form connections outside the bullying environment.
Spend time with family and friends who love you.
Take pride in your appearance.
Indulge in your hobbies.
Stand up for yourself.

Practice these tips, and you just might show your bullies that you aren’t such an easy target after all.

This post was all about the resilience Strategies you can use to deter bullies so that you can bully-proof yourself and live in peace.

Related posts you’ll enjoy:

1. Resilience: 16 Ways to Stand Tall When You Suffer Bullying

2. How to Defend Yourself from Bullies: 5 Powerful Strategies

3. Confident Body Language: 11 Ways to Look Confident

4. Comebacks for Bullies: 12 Phrases that Shut Them Up

5. Good Roasts for Bullies: 25 Comebacks that Shut Them Up.

6. How to Shut Down a Bully: 11 Comebacks that Stop Them Cold